Trevor Strnad's Deadspeak

Trevor Strnad has taken a break from writing kick-ass metal with his band The Black Dahlia Murder to bring us another installment of Deadspeak…this time, wondering when — and if — Morbid Angel’s long-awaited new album will finally surface.

Around 2001, I saw a concert in which Zyklon was opening for Morbid Angel and Deicide…not really surprised that Thor Anders Myhren (a.k.a. Destructhor) has been chosen as the second guitarist. Zyklon was a good band with a lot of excellent Morbid Angel-style riffage — not to mention his penchant for wearing do-rags, which pretty much fits right into the scheme of things, visually, for Morbid Angel 2011.

Now, up front, we’ve got a do rag guy (you’ve got long hair, man — if you don’t take it down to headbang while you play guitar in Morbid Angel, then when exactly is it for?), Trey with his mystical parachute pants, and of course, Mr. David Vincent. In the back, holding down the drum throne during Pete Sandoval’s (hopefully) temporary absence, we’ve got master of the streaked hair and tanning bed arts, the ravishing Tim Yeung.

A couple of years back, before the talk of this new Morbid Angel record ever began, I happened upon ol’ Vincent at NAMM while Black Dahlia were out in California scoping for a new drummer. Even with a few cocktails in me, I still didn’t have the cojones to talk to him. I wanted to go up to him and tell him how much I like his band, but what do you really say to one of the most legendary death metal musicians of all time that he hasn’t heard before before: “Ugh, that one song from Blessed Are The Sick…huh, huh, that was cool.” 

Yeah right. He was definitely at least eleven feet tall. He was wearing a shiny vinyl pentagram shirt…something straight of out a Hot Topic nightmare; and a black cowboy hat…perhaps we’re still shaking off the fairy dust from rolling with the Genitorturers for a few years — whatever, I don’t mind. He could be fucking spray-painted gold as long as they make more songs like “Nevermore.” 

How long have we been listening to that song now? According to Blabbermouth, the first evidence of it surfaced July 4, 2008, in the form of a YouTube video of them playing the song at Gods of Metal festival in Italy…that’s a lot of time to ‘build anticipation.’ Seems more like lunacy to me. Surely I am going to go fucking crazy if they don’t tell me when this shit is coming out. From the date it is announced, it’ll be at least three more months of waiting for advertising purposes as well…UGH! At this point, I figure I’m liable to die if I don’t get to hear it in the next six months. I don’t think the odds are very much in my favor. Goodbye cruel world — think of me. In fact, contact me on a Ouija board and tell me if it was any good. 

If I do for some reason make it to the release date, I have 100 sticks of lavender incense and some weed called Mystical Touch set aside for such a grand occasion.  Wish me luck. Until one of these two even happens, I’m going to sit here in my robe, staring at the spinning pentagram animated gif on and masturbate

  • David William Shattuck

    hahaha nice Trevor, i havent really listened to Morbid Angel i was thinking about it yesterday but didnt :/ maybe i shoult

  • MACHETE420

    Want da herbs.

  • wheels

    “You’ve got long hair, man —if you don’t take it down to headbang while you play guitar in Morbid Angel, then when exactly is it for?”

    fucking great.

  • flowers and rainbow kisses

    no offense, but the album Nocturnal by your band is way heavier than any Morbid Angel album. Different yes, but heavier no doubt…

    • flowers and rainbow kisses

      i mean, not like you’re going to go listen to your own album, but in case no one has sincerely told you before that TBDM is in fact heavier than most bands in and out of existence, no matter what anyone says, ever.

      so you’ve got that going for you, which is nice

      mystical touch

    • Enid


    • TD

      heavier than morbid? let’s not be silly here, man

      • flowers and rainbow kisses

        you’re silly for thinking i’m silly, man

  • ch-ch-ch-chia!

    you took the words right out of my mouth

    the wait for this album has been ridiculous and im not very hyped about it anymore, of course when it actually does come out i’ll be as giddy as a little child

  • TD

    i am glad someon has saved some shit for that day….It will be great. Heretic is so roiginal that most reviews u read don’t like it…funny–i look forward to the new MA!

  • Friendofbud666

    I think the name is Incubation of the Evil Ones. I got to meet them for the Heretic album here in Texas. Alas that metal shop is gone forever….

  • host

    Really good tour that also included Soilent Green & Exhumed. Jared Anderson was on vocals for Steve Tucker, who I think may have influenced the style of a certain thick black frame glasses wearing guy…just maybe. I don’t think you can properly channel the ancient ones without hammer pants though. I’m pretty sure it says so in an old book somewhere.

  • Kvlt-Mart

    Who needs lavender incense when you can get Morbid Angel incense in a custom pentagram burner?

  • Jakesballs-yerchin

    Trevor Strnad is a flaccid penis for not updating this fucking blog, he is an undersized flaccid penis for blocking me on the band fbook page. I used to consider these cats cool, even the best at metaling. … they’re dabbling with bigger spirits now, and obviously for sale to the highest spiritual bidder. Used to PUT the punk in metal, now they ARE the punk in metal.

    • Jakegames5253

      Hyup. Like a baby turtle.

  • Jake Gamezz

    haha, strnad won’t even come to denver now. hahahaha

  • Ryland_Fleming

    That new album is garbage.

  • Luke Chaston

    Oh trevor, I do pity you, Anticipating this shit…Morbid, consider your legacy demoloshed with a bulldozer 

  • Jakegames5253

    Flaccidly updated blog, dude.

  • Nordmen555

    Update this fucking blog you faggot.