Anderson Cooper: Not Metal

Anderson Cooper throws the horns

Solid journalist? Yes.

Nice, cordial dude I met once at a dual CNN/MTV event? Absolutely.

Kvlt? Not one iota.

But the other night, before signing off from his show, CNN anchor Anderson Cooper featured a song, named after him, written by an alleged “metal” band that sounds more punk or hardcore.

The “RidicuList” segment where Anderson throws the horns and pretends to be metal, which all the blogs posted the other day as cool but it’s actually quite lame, at the end of this post.

“Like ‘Uptown Girl’ and ‘Tiny Dancer’ before me, I, Anderson Cooper, am now the subject of a soulful ballad,” the CNN host revealed. “The name of the song? Well, it’s called ‘Anderson Cooper,” which, let’s be honest, has a certain understated charm, much like myself, if I do say so myself. But the band’s name is Cryptic Murmurs, and I think the song really captures my easy-going essence.”

He added: “Eat your heart out, Metallica, take note, Wolf Blitzer, because I shall henceforth be known as Anderson Cooper, CNN cyborg,” Cooper said on Thursday. “I’m not quite sure that is a compliment, but let’s face it, I’ve been called worse.”

The song’s lyrics refer to Cooper as a “CNN cyborg.” Hence…yeah.

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About Chris Harris

Chris Harris is an internationally-published music journalist and writer whose work has appeared on the pages of Rolling Stone, IFC, Revolver, Alternative Press, and Radar. The former news editor for Noisecreep, Harris also served as co-host for the site’s weekly podcast, “Creep Show." Before that, he spent four years writing for MTV News.