Venom Cover May Be Worst Thing You’ll Ever Hear

Many demerits

Many demerits

My initial reaction to the following Venom cover was “What is this lame-ass bullshit?”

Seriously. What the fuck is up with the following cover?

Are you trying to make everyone who ever liked metal hate your ass? Is it a joke?

Whatever it is, it may actually be the worst thing you ever hear. After everything that has been released by Five Frenzied Clam Munch.

The fools responsible for this garbage are called The Soft Pink Truth.

The truth is you suck.

Like, a barrel filled with dicks.

The cover shows up on the band’s forthcoming effort Who Do The Heathen Rage: Electronic Profanations Of Black Metal Classics, which comes out June 17 and also will boast Mayhem, Darkthrone, Hellhammer, and Sarcofago covers.

See red in five, four, three, two…GO!

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About Chris Harris

Chris Harris is an internationally-published music journalist and writer whose work has appeared on the pages of Rolling Stone, IFC, Revolver, Alternative Press, and Radar. The former news editor for Noisecreep, Harris also served as co-host for the site’s weekly podcast, “Creep Show." Before that, he spent four years writing for MTV News.

  • bloodsweatandtears

    WHAT A DISGRACE!!!

  • whatcom_bassist

    Beyond horrible.

  • Mr.H

    What the FUCK!

  • Benjamin Vangeel

    Is it not a possibility that these fags are simply parodying Black Metal? I mean, c’mon, NOBODY is this retarded.

  • user name

    Think you missed the point of it all.
    Your rage fueled article states the answer to the question of the album.

    “Why Do The Heathen Rage?”

    (In your case) Because you are not a real heathen. You simply follow the rock & roll religion.

    But at least you tried…

    Poser.

  • Joshua Zimberg

    “Five Frenzied Clam Munch” made me think of Five Iron Frenzy.