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Primitive Weapons Signs With Prosthetic

Posted by Chris Harris on January 6, 2012 in News

There is a lot I hate in this world. Ignorance. People who drive too slow in the fast lane. Chicks that don’t “do the blowjob thing.” Having to work for money and not for pleasure. People who abuse animals. Attack! Attack! The list goes on and on and on, trust me. But there’s one breed of human that tops that list.

No, that person does not work at Prosthetic Records and is a member of New York City space doom adventurers Primitive Weapons.

Which reminds me: Prosthetic Records has announced that they’ve signed the band and will release the group’s debut album, which was recorded at Wild Arctic Studios with Dean Baltolunis.

A spring release is being eyed.

Anyways, the person I hate most in the world. It’s not you — and you know who you are and I know you read this fucking thing religiously, so, the jig is up.

The person I hate most in the world is the person who can’t find it in them to take two seconds to respond to a text message or email.
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Posted in News | Tagged new album, new deal, new record, primitive weapons, prosthetic | 1 Comment

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Molotov Solution Lose Guitarist

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in Departures, News

Oh no! What ever shall we do now?

Molotov Solution is down a man.

The band’s parted ways with guitarist Robbie Pina. Cody Jarvis will serve as his fill-in until a permanent replacement is found.

“After recently taking some time off for personal reasons, Robbie has decided to step down,” Molotov Solution says in a statement.

“For now, we are calling on our friend Cody Jarvis to fill his place until we find a full time replacement. Anyone worried about musical material differences will not be disappointed, especially if you are a fan of Insurrection.”
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Posted in Departures, News | Tagged break in, Cody Jarvis, guitarist, lose, molotov solution, quits, Robbie Pina, stolen, thieves, this sucks, van | Leave a comment

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Dysrhythmia Sign With Profound Lore

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in New Records, News

Phatness!

New York progressive rock metallers Dysrhythmia announced today that they’ve signed with Profound Lore Records.

The group had previously released several albums with Relapse Records.

“We are excited to announce we will be working with Profound Lore Records, for the release of our next album,” the band says in a statement.

“Recording will commence this Spring with Colin Marston, with a projected late Summer/Fall release date. We’re gonna do our most to make this the best Dysrhythmia yet.”
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Posted in New Records, News | Tagged dysrhythmia, new album, new deal, new record, profound lore, relapse | Leave a comment

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Oceano Now Saying They’re Probably Done

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in News, Rad

Oh glorious day. Look outside, kids. The sunny is shining, the birds are singing a cheerful song — the lady in the building next to yours forgot to close her blinds after her shower. Oh glorious afternoon!

Oceano have broken their silence on long-standing rumors they’re shitcanning the band.

It seems they read this site, because they are — indeed — throwing in the fucking towel.

Good. These dudes are worthless.

“Just to clear everything up, Oceano is NOT looking for a new singer,” the band says on Facebook.
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Posted in News, Rad | Tagged adam warren, break up, broken up, dead, dissolved, done, fired, howard jones, killswitch engage, oceano, over, quit, rumors, split up | 3 Comments

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Avatar Sign With eOne Music

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in New Records, News

So, I am not familiar with Avatar. Apparently, they’re from Sweden. And like top hats and circuses.

Well, they just signed with eOne Music, for the North American release of Black Waltz, which drops February 14.

A press release claims “the band has been making waves in Europe with multiple appearances on festivals like Sweden Rock Festival, Arvikafestivalen and Storsjöyran.”

All I know is, the video that follows features the lead singer pulling a bloody condom out of his nose.

That’s not cool, dude. In fact, it sort of ruined my morning coffee.
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Posted in New Records, News | Tagged avatar, black waltz, eone music, new album, new deal, new record, sweden | Leave a comment

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Patrick Shannon’s Blissfully Oblivious: Drunk In Downingtown With Mike And Jess 

Posted by Patrick Shannon on January 5, 2012 in Featured, Patrick Shannon's Hilarity Ensues

Patrick Shannon of All Else Failed is back with another installment of his column, which has a new name for 2012

Jackie my love and Jwow Covey on a rare East Coast appearance. The Hotel? Good enough for the girls we roll with; The Pharcyde on the juke box. Drew Brees juking dirty birds left and right, making a name for himself, or setting a record or something. In tears again about the year.

Mike pumps me up about anything he can think of to take his mind of his own week, tells me he’s been reading these and how much they’ve meant to him. I haven’t read a one since the send key, figure they’re best served to hit the world as they come to me. 

Words aren’t music after all. 
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Posted in Featured, Patrick Shannon's Hilarity Ensues | Tagged all else failed, blissfully oblivious, column, patrick shannon, ryan and zac, the pharcyde | Leave a comment

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Dave Grohl Working With Ratt’s Pearcy And DeMartini; Is Probot Making A Return?

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in Huh?, News

That’s right.

Dave Grohl is allegedly working on a top secret project and Ratt’s Stephen Pearcy has told the world about it.

Pearcy — I’m sure — had Grohl’s permission to discuss his own involvement in Dave’s new project. I truly, truly hope this is just a sign that a second Probot record is on the way.

Pearcy and Ratt’s lead guitarist Warren DeMartini recently recorded a song with Grohl, for this project he’s working on.

Said Pearcy in an online post: “We’ll let [Dave] tell you about [it] when he’s ready, kidz. Not for a Ratt record.”

Probot, Probot, Probot.

Meanwhile, Pearcy’s new solo album, Sucker Punch, is due in stores later this year.
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Posted in Huh?, News | Tagged dave grohl, probot, project, ratt, recording, secret, stephen pearcy, Warren DeMartini | 1 Comment

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Kayo Dot Release New EP

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in New Records, News

Yeah. They have.

Yesterday, Kayo Dot released a digital EP called Gamma Knife.

The effort boasts five songs, and was partially recorded live at Littlefield in Brooklyn on October 5, 2011, by Jeremiah Cymerman.

The other parts of the release were recorded at home by Toby Driver between October and November of 2011. The EP was mixed and mastered by Randall Dunn at Avast in Seattle last month.

The EP starts out really mellow, and has a very chilled out vibe. But then…it comes to life. And it is only $5, too. If you wanna just listen to it, head here.
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Posted in New Records, News | Tagged bandcamp, gamma knife, kayo dot, listen, new ep | Leave a comment

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It’s 2012, And Still, No Reason To Attend Warped Tour

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in Huh?, News

Yup.

I won’t be attending Warped Tour. No way, no how.

So far, the bill is pretty fucking beat. And each week they roll out the newest additions to the lineup, and I just shrug and think, “What time is it?”

The latest additions to Warped include Impending Doom, Blessthefall, Machine Gun Kelly, A Loss For Words, Man Overboard, Stepdad and Super Water Sympathy.

Wow. It’s so underwhelming, I can’t even breathe. I just passed out from loss of oxygen.
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Posted in Huh?, News | Tagged A Loss For Words, Bayside, blessthefall, chelsea grin, every time i die, impending doom, Machine Gun Kelly, man overboard, Memphis May Fire, sleeping with sirens, Stepdad, Super Water Sympathy, The Silver Comet, warped tour | 4 Comments

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Saliva Singer Quits, Looks To Pursue Career As Christian Artist

Posted by Chris Harris on January 5, 2012 in Departures, Huh?, News

Well, man…I did not see that one coming. I figured Josey Scott was a fucking animal. The type of dude who’d make girls shove baseball bats in their asses for his own sick amusement. But I guess Josey’s found — gulp! — God.

According to The Pulse Of Radio, Scott and Saliva quietly parted ways late last year.

Guitarist Wayne Swinny told some Texas radio station KFMX all about it. I live in New York, where all the stations start with W’s, so it always bugs me out when stations have names that start with anything other than a W.

Swinny says Scott left the group after a decade and a half to pursue a career as a solo Christian artist.

Although Saliva’s future was shaky there for a while, they didn’t do the right thing and break up. Nope — they’re inflicting more awful music on humanity, enlisting a new singer named Bobby Amaru.

I love when dudes find Jesus.
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Posted in Departures, Huh?, News | Tagged bobby amaru, christian, departure, josey scott, leaves, new singer, part ways, quit, saliva, solo career, wayne swinny | 15 Comments