Napalm Death, Lock Up Members Help Liquid Graveyard

Happy metal people

Holy fucking shit, folks! Like a bastard, I was working all live, long day being a breaking news man. Today, I got to invade the privacy of others, was called “scum” and told “to get a real job,” had a gang of baseball players threaten my life, and was thrown off a college campus, all […]

Iron Maiden Frontman To Make Full Recovery


Thank some higher power. Have your pick. Bruce Dickinson, the man who fronts Iron Maiden and has impeccable taste in pants, will fully recovery from his tongue cancer. The band claims specialists have issued a positive prognosis regarding the tumor that has grown at the back of Bruce’s mouth. “Over the last few days, Bruce […]

Update Offered On Iron Maiden’s Bruce Dickinson


By now, you should have read the sad news that Bruce Dickinson of Iron Maiden has a cancerous tumor on the back of his tongue, for which he is seeking treatment. It’s scary when your heroes fall ill, but by all accounts, Bruce will be back on his feet and belting out songs soon enough. […]

Iron Maiden Drummer Says New Album Is Done


Nicko McBrain may look like he built his own house, and hammered everything together with his face, but I have loads of respect for the Iron Maiden drummer. Obviously. I mean, he’s a legend. He’s played a part in the creation of some of my favorite songs. He’s the man. He’s probably also experienced some […]

Iron Maiden’s Bruce Dickinson Battling Cancer


Iron Maiden frontman Bruce Dickinson has cancer. But not to fret — the tumor was caught early and Bruce is expected to make a full recovery. The man we all respect and wish we were has complete a course of chemotherapy and radiology after the discovery of a cancerous tumor on the back of his […]

Ensign Bassist Needs Help

Nate Gluck

This sucks the inside of a condom clean. Nate Gluck, the bassist for Ensign, is ill. He was recently diagnosed with stomach and esophagus cancer. Gluck and his wife are also facing financial difficulties, so they’ve launched a crowd-funding campaign which has already raised enough money to help them keep their home. Contribute what you […]

Def Leppard Guitarist To Receive Stem-Cell Transplant

Vivian Campbell

Def Leppard guitarist Vivian Campbell will receive a stem-cell transplant in September after doctors discovered his cancer’s back. Campbell revealed his battle with Hodgkin’s lymphoma diagnosis last summer, but announced in November that he was in remission. His approach to fighting the cancer will involve a new high-tech chemo treatment. He says in a new […]

Megadeth Cancel Immediate Touring Plans


The death of Dave Ellefson’s brother has forced the cancellation of Megadeth’s immediate touring plans/ A statement says Ellefson “and his family mourn the loss of his brother, who passed away on May 19, in Minneapolis, Minn. after battling cancer. A private family funeral service will be held.” The statement makes no mention of making […]

HellYeah’s Guitarist Calls Former Members “Cancer”


So HellYeah’s guitarist, Tom Maxwell, was interviewed on the Jacksonville, North Carolina, radio station Rock 105.5 at this year’s assemblage of white trash, the Carolina Rebellion festival. In it, he calls Mudvayne’s Greg Tribbett as well as the band’s former bassist, Bob “Zilla” Kakaha, cancers that needed excising. Blood For Blood, the mediocre band’s new […]

Former Judas Priest Guitarist Dead


According to Blabbermouth, Judas Priest co-founding guitarist Ernie Chataway has died at the age of 62. He was reportedly battling lung cancer for quite some time before his death. That sucks. Poor guy. Rest in peace, Ernie. The original Priest lineup featured Chataway, singer Al Atkins, bassist Bruno Stapenhill and drummer John Partridge, and came […]