It’s A Slow News Day…So Here’s A Joe Satriani Post

The Satriani box

Whenever I think about Joe Satriani, I think of my first college roommate. The dude was a Satriani and Steve Via nut, and probably reads this Web site. He was also just a plain old nut, and I’d return from class to catch him watching re-runs of “Doogie Howser,” scratching the bottoms of his bare […]

GunShyAssassin Presents Metal’s Top 25 Album Openers: #5 to #1

Altars of Madness

We’ve endeavored to assemble the most comprehensive, least-fuck-with-able list of metal’s 25 best album openers — a series that concludes today with the Top 5. 5. Joe Satriani, “Surfing With The Alien” I was mesmerized when I first heard this song; it was easily the coolest thing to ever lay waste to my ears. Guitar […]

Joe Satriani Releasing New Album In May

Mr. Clean can play!

He’s bald, cheesy and can play. And on May 7, legendary guitarist Joe Satriani will release his 14th studio album, Unstoppable Momentum. The disc will be issued by Epic Records and was recorded at Skywalker Sound in the Bay Area. Satriani produced it with Mike Fraser. The album features an array of talented players, including […]

Chickenfoot Going On Hiatus For 2013


NO!!!!!!!!! Dude. Does anyone care about this band, even remotely? I’m serious. I want to know. I only write about the band when I see them make news because I like to refer to Sammy Hagar as the Red Rocker. That’s who he is. Sammy says in a new holiday message to fans that Chickenfoot […]

Eddie Van Halen Named Greatest Guitarist Ever

Eddie Van Halen

Eddie Van Halen of Van Halen is the greatest guitarist of all time, said Eddie Van Halen. I kid. He was named such in a new poll hosted by the crooks at Guitar World magazine. Almost half a million votes were cast in the tournament-style poll, which began in April with a total of 132 […]

Mike Portnoy Teams With John Sykes For New Band

Mike Portnoy

Former Dream Theater and Avenged Sevenfold dummer Mike Portnoy has yet another band to keep him busy. In addition to Adrenaline Mob, Mike has now teamed up with Whitesnake guitarist and vocalist John Sykes, who is also known for his work with Thin Lizzy. The band also features an as-yet-undisclosed bassist, and the unnamed project […]

Chickenfoot Signs New Deal With eOne


According to a press release, eOne Music has completed a new, exclusive deal with hard rock supergroup Chickenfoot for North America. The group — Sammy Hagar, Joe Satriani, Michael Anthony and Chad Smith — will release its sophomore album, titled Chickenfoot III, in late September 2011. Chad Smith has said for a while that he […]

Metallica Confirmed For Quebec’s Summer Festival


Well, isn’t that nice for Metallica? Yeah, I bet they’re going to make a killing playing in Canada, and they’ll also have a great time while visiting the land that’s spawned dozens of amazing comedians and lots of hot chicks and is home to some of the greatest cities in North America. Lucky Metallica. I […]

Chad Smith Says He Can’t Tour In 2011 With Chickenfoot

Drummer Chad Smith isn’t a millionaire because of Chickenfoot. This is something he’s well aware of. And hence, next year when his side project Chickenfoot heads out on tour in support of their second record, he won’t be with them. That’s because the Red Hot Chili Peppers need to record their next hit-busting LP. In […]

Joe Satriani Gig Smoked Out; Fire Officials Called

Ever since that whole Great White inferno death trap thing went down six years or more ago in Rhode Island, fire officials across the country have been on high alert regarding these old concert venues, massive, drunken audiences, and potential hazards. So it shouldn’t have surprised the people who caught Joe Satriani’s show in Napa, […]