Alejandro Chavez’s Bloody Shins And Barbells

Alejandro Chavez’s Bloody Shins and Barbells

Our buddy Al happens to front a band called Ipsissimus. For over a year, we’d tried to get the scribe to pen something for us. Turns out he just needed some inspiration. Here now is Alejandro Chavez’s second column for Gun Shy Assassin, documenting his efforts to bulk up.

I’m starting to understand why so many people hate vegans.

The public face of veganism seems to be predominantly built around converting others to our lifestyle. I say, “Fuck that.” I recently purchased a subscription to a vegan fitness publication. Foolishly I thought, “Finally, a resource for the nutritional needs of an active vegan.” I was looking for something to help me dial in my nutrition so that I’m eating absolutely everything I need. I needed some scientific research on nutrition, maybe some nutrient profiles of different vegetables, perhaps the occasional tips page from a vegan athlete. Did I get any of that? Only I’m the most peripheral way. 

This publication mostly gave me vegan propaganda. Which is to say it spends way too much time telling me that a plant-based diet is best without giving me any real information. This remains utterly useless to me. I’ve already made my choice, backed by a lot of research, why are you still trying convince me?

In addition to the lack of real info, I got article upon article of vegans who exercise, complete with the most plebian questions, such as, “Why did you become vegan?” Everybody has the same fucking answer, yet they think theirs is a beautiful unique snowflake that’s going to transform the world’s opinion on animal products. Guess what, kiddo? Not gonna fucking happen.

Then each article will go on to have them describe what they eat in a day, hardships they face as vegans (which is fucking bullshit because, in America, anybody looking to keep a healthy diet has a hard time), blah, blah, blah, everyone should do what I do, blah, blah, blah. The reason people hate is because, in our public voices, we tend only talk about ourselves and why we’re right, even to each other. Let’s stop justifying our choices to each other and start helping each learn how to optimize our nutrition so we aren’t haphazardly eating veggie burgers and tofu pups every meal and calling that healthy. 

Bottom line, I got sold a lifestyle magazine with more in common with Shape or Woman’s Day when I was looking for a sports nutrition journal. This is my fault and i wanted to vent. I appreciate your time.

I want to take this opportunity to let you guys know I’ll gladly answer any questions you might have. Just email me at [email protected]

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