Bring Me The Horizon’s New Video: Huh?

My thoughts exactly

I just don’t get these newfangled metalcore bands and their wacky videos. Man, there’s never any hot chicks in videos anymore. I feel bad for all these pussies I see at the mall in their Attack! Attack! and Iwrestledabearonce shirts and they just look so sad because no one will fuck ‘em. That’ll make anyone sad. But these kids grew up with very different videos than the ones I watched as a kid in the ‘80s.

Rock videos had busty whores that writhed around in classrooms and on the hoods of cars and…wait, what am I saying. I didn’t have the Internet like these fucks. These kids can see whatever the fuck they want, porn-wise, whenever they want. Hell, all these kids are into the butt sex, too. That will be the downfall of our society, mark my words. Anal. That’s right. Anyways, I guess the readily-available abundance of porn means rockers don’t have to get hotties anymore, and they can get all philosophical and academic on our asses. I just don’t get what Bring Me The Horizon are trying to tell us with this clip.

I can’t tell. It starts off like a video game. An ambulance races down the street and is being driven by a dude whose entire head is covered in bandages. It would remind you of the cover of Mars Volta’s Frances the Mute, but then again, maybe it won’t. Then one of the kids from the band is on a stretcher in the back of what is clearly not an ambulance with a big-titted old broad with faded tats who resembles that Nazi bitch Jesse James was plugging.

It’s a pretty vicious song, as far as metalcore goes. The track — “It Never Ends” — comes from the band’s forthcoming, brevity-challenged LP There Is A Hell, Believe Me I’ve Seen It. There Is A Heaven, Let’s Keep It A Secret. I fucking hate that title. Anyways, then, all these vampiric folks start chasing the ambulance, and the nurse takes a chainsaw or something and cuts open dude’s stomach and pulls out his liver to feed to the vampire people. Then, the dude’s flying through the clouds and…just watch it. The vampire people come back, he’s in a hospital, and I am still confused. Help!

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