I remember years ago, when I was at MTV News, commenting on how I couldn’t wait until the day Lindsay Lohan was finally at a point in her life that she’d do Playboy. I never thought that day would come so soon, but I have seen the Lindsay Lohan Playboy pics — as most of you probably have already — and let me just say this: I’d fuck the snot out of her.
That said I thought her pom poms looked exquisite, but really, for $1 million dollars, Playboy should have gotten full frontal.
Slipknot and Stone Sour frontman Corey Taylor has also seen Lindsay’s nude photos, and is also apparently mad she doesn’t show puss. He recently bashed the has-been actress, saying that in the pictorial, she looks “like a series of toll booths.”
Here’s what Corey said: “If anyone hasn’t seen the Lindsey Lohan Playboy shots yet, save your fucking money. She looks like a series of toll booths. She looks like somebody has fucking tossed their fucking change into it, and you’re just like…ugh.”
Wow. Brutal, Corey. Tell us more, tell us more.
“I didn’t know you could airbrush that much — I’ve gotta be honest — because her body is, like, it’s okay, but her face is, like, [makes face like he just saw his parent’s boning]. It’s like somebody opened the Ark Of The Covenant at the end of ‘Raiders Of The Lost Ark,’ you know what I’m saying?! That one dude who’s just melting like a motherfucker.”
Corey then said “Boo,” and gave a thumbs down.
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