Denied! U.S. Government Blocks The Haarp Machine

The Haarp Machine

U.K. progressive metal outfit The Haarp Machine may have to fly to Mexico and then hop the border if they’re fixing to get into the United States.

In a new online update, The Haarp Machine informed fans that “The American Government has denied us entry into the U.S. Go figure.”

I wonder why that is?

They said “Go figure.” So there has to be an obvious reason.

Could it be because one of the dude’s in the band is named Abdullah Al-Mu’min? In these increasingly sensitive, lame-ass times, I’m sure that’s what it was. Homeland Security goes to extremes, man.

A less likely reason could be the band’s name: it appears they’ve named themselves after the High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program, a military research initiative that caused some controversy back in the dizzay.

This does not bode well for the band’s upcoming North America trek later this month with Decapitated and Decrepit Birth.

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