Jos. von Wienerhaus’ Wiener Of The Week: The Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame

Deep PurpleDeep Purple

Deep Purple

And the wiener is…
 
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Last week it was the Grammys, now it’s another insidious excuse of placing musicians on high. With Deep Purple on the nominee list for the second year in a row, the band have now been declined just as many times. When anyone thinks of pure rock music, if the first band that doesn’t come to mind is Deep Purple, they’re wrong. That’s that.
 
Deep Purple were the biggest band on the entire planet for quite some time, getting into loads of trouble, cranking out timeless masterpieces, and doing more coke than the entirety of Miami over the span of the city’s two decade height of nasal excess. Instead of inducting the band that wrote In Rock, Who Do We Think We Are, and Burn, Nirvana and god damn Hall and Oates made it in.
 
Nirvana can be credited for writing and inspiring some of the worst rock-oriented music the world has ever come to known. As a wise friend once told me, the best thing to come out of Nirvana was the back of Kurt Cobain’s head. Agonizing vocal performances and watered-down Rock Lite is what Nirvana is to rock music.
 
“Kiss on My List” is now officially more rock than “Rat Bat Blue” and “Child in Time” according to the wrinkled, dust-ejaculating committee responsible for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame’s “prestigious” alumni. I’ve been there and it sucks.

They had an entire floor dedicated to U2. What there should have been was a doorway leading to a ramp outside to jump off of, so you too, can end the life you’ve been wasting at this blatant cash grab scam.
 
I’m surprised Rush haven’t requested to be taken out of the Hall. It seems like a place where bands who are done achieving can go to get their name back in the headlines for a day.
 
That’s why you, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, are the Wiener of the Week.

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