Tool Inspired By Willy Wonka With Opiate Reissue

Tool

Hey Charlie, you poor, miserable fuck!

You could be one of five lucky fans to get something extra special in their copies of Tool’s upcoming commemorative reissue of their Opiate EP.

This is kind of cool, actually. They’re called “Seal of Xatanitos,” and the five certificates will be placed randomly amidst the 5,000 copies of the collectible reissue.

The prize will only be disclosed to each of the five winners.

That blows. I mean, what if the prize is a bottle of Maynard’s wine. That’d be whack as fuck. Maybe if Maynard gave a personal tour of his vineyard…now that’d be cool.

It’s gotta be something big. I mean, in “Wonka,” the prize was a tour. This is what I am thinking this prize will be — some sort of tour.

A tour of your rectum by one of the band members’ wangs. I kid.

The 21st-anniversary edition of Opiate will be available through the band’s Web site on March 26.

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