Warrant Kick Jani While He’s Down

Warrant

Warrant is pissed the fuck off. The recent arrest, conviction, and sentencing of former frontman Jani Lane has brought much embarrassment to the much-respected, much-revered, highly-influential 1980s two-hit-wonders Warrant. You see, Warrant are still active. Read that again — Warrant are still an active band.

Oh, and they want you to know Lane is no longer in the band. In a statement, the band really rips into Jani, and really is just a 200-word kick in the balls, with a nice little punch-in-the-gut P.S. at the end, just for extra old guy bitterness.

“Warrant was founded on the notion that any press is good press, and for that, we would like to thank AOL, Perez Hilton and TMZ for their continued front page cover stories regarding Jani Lane,” the band writes. “When you run your next update, please note that he is NOT the singer in Warrant. With the exception of a failed 11 show reunion in 2008, he has not been affiliated with Warrant in over seven years.”

These days, former Lynch Mob throat Robert Mason is behind the microphone “along with original band members Joey Allen, Jerry Dixon, Steven Sweet and Erik Turner,” who, the statement digs, “will not be in jail and are ready to rock and roll as scheduled. If you (the press) are going to run these stories, please spell our names correctly and get the facts straight.”

Then…THEN, there’s a plug for their Web site and that P.S

“P.S. We do wish Lane all the best in his on-going efforts.”

Fuck you Warrant. You start off statements with well-wishes, and then, go into what’s bugging you. And the dude clearly has a drinking problem. He’s about to go to the pokey. You’re going to gripe about the affiliation and add some unneeded jabs? Why am I not surprised you took the low road?

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